Why Do We Do Things in Excess?
Why do we overeat?
In fact, I have a better question - why do we do anything in excess? Why are we addicted to certain things like coffee? Why do we use certain things as a crutch when we're struggling?
Today, I’m going to explore three reasons why we get addicted to certain habits and behaviors, such as overeating, and how we can actually move through it to the other side.
I know that eating, weight, and everything in-between is an incredible sensitive topic for most of us, and it’s always my intention to speak about these things with the utmost respect for anyone going through challenges in this area of their life.
I believe we each have our own incredibly complex relationship with food, so this is just a top-level observation of the dynamic between overeating and emotions.
What I’ve realized is that we often approach our well-being in a very individual way.
If someone is struggling to lose weight, we immediately look at the diet. But do we look at the emotions? Do we look at the root cause underneath unhealthy eating habits? If someone has an addiction to alcohol, do we just try to take them off the alcohol? Or do we look underneath and see what may be going on beneath the surface?
These are the things I love to explore through my work, so let’s dive in.
1. Overeating as a form of safety
This may sound a little strange, but food is a comfort blanket. From the time we were babies, we were soothed with food such as our mother’s milk. And after that, whenever we cried or were stressed, we were often given food.
“Oh, you have a toothache? Here, have a lollipop.”
“Oh, you lost your favorite toy? Here, have an ice cream.”
Food has always been a comforter, so no wonder it has magical soothing properties when used in the right way. But a deeper reason why we may want to carry extra weight is linked to safety and survival.
Weight can act as a physical barrier, almost like a suit of armor that protects us from the outside world. This often stems from past trauma that is still cycling through our nervous system. Trauma stays stuck in our bodies until we can safely release it.
This is something I work with in my sessions because trauma is a massive deregulator in life. It can have huge consequences unless we address it and gently, compassionately release it from the body. Somatic practitioners are right on the money with this - our bodies hold onto trauma, and that’s why we need to release it.
2. Overeating as a way to numb our feelings
We often overeat to numb our emotions. But it’s not just eating, we use many things to distract ourselves from feeling.
Scrolling through social media. Binge-watching Netflix. Obsessively going to the gym. Shopping. Gossiping. Anything that basically helps us not feel.
And often, we’re not even conscious of these habits and behaviors. Feeling the thing we don’t want to feel can be so deeply uncomfortable and scary that we’ll do anything to avoid it.
I know this all too well because, in my Soul Contract, I have energies that resist feeling deeply. If you’re curious about the energies in your Soul Contract, here’s a link to explore your numbers, as it can be so illuminating in understanding why you face certain challenges and how to move through them.
But back to the point. We numb our feelings because we don’t want to go into the darkness, the depth, the problem-solving. It feels easier to be an ostrich and bury our heads in the sand. And our sandbox? It can be anything we choose, and often, it’s food.
One thing I learned when studying Kinesiology is that when we crave sweet foods, it’s often because we’re lacking joy in our lives. The sweetness of life is missing. So if you find yourself constantly reaching for chocolate, ask yourself: Is there joy missing from my life? If so, how can you bring it back in?
3. Overeating as a way to ground
This is a really interesting one, coming from a more spiritual perspective. Many of us overeat or gain weight as a way to ground ourselves, especially those of us on a spiritual journey.
Spiritual awakening often comes with a tough life path. There is trauma and the weight provides a sense of grounding and safety, helping to anchor trauma in some way. But beyond trauma, weight is inherently grounding, particularly for very ethereal souls, those of us who sometimes feel like they don’t quite fit in, who find earthly life challenging, who long for “home.”
This is common for those with certain energies in their soul contract, especially the 5-5 and 10-1 energies. These energies are big thinkers, but are often disconnected from earthly life, which is why weight can act as a way to physically anchor them here.
But what if we could ground ourselves in other ways? Through spending time in nature, grounding yoga practices, eating root vegetables and earthy foods and meditation?
Experiences with food and overeating
Weight and our relationship with food are also deeply connected to how we perceive our value and worth. If we nourish ourselves with wonderful food, we often have a healthier relationship with ourselves. But let’s be real, we all struggle to eat well sometimes. And that’s okay. It’s all part of the journey.
I remember a time when I was deeply unhappy. I was 21, living in Paris, supposedly living the dream. I had just finished a ski season with loads of friends when I moved to Paris to be a cycle and Segway tour guide. But after moving there, I felt so lonely.
I lived above a supermarket, and I ate and ate and ate. Because I was exhausted. Because I was unhappy. Because I didn’t know how to deal with those emotions of homesickness and lonliness.
I didn’t have the tools then that I have now. Now, I know that fear underpins so much of our emotional struggles.
So, I hope this resonates with someone out there. We’ve all had moments where we reach for things we know we shouldn’t. But there’s nothing wrong with that. We’re all figuring it out as we go.
If these kinds of conversations resonate with you, I invite you to stay connected. I share insights like these regularly, helping people deepen their spiritual and emotional awareness. If you’d like to explore more, feel free to subscribe on YouTube or follow along here.
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